Can you see me? Can you really see me?
Updated: Apr 29, 2019
Not long after the loss of my dear brother nearly 10 years ago, my childhood neighbor had a dream about him. In it, she was one of last to leave church and she started to make her way to the door. As she glanced toward the exit, she looked up and saw my brother. She was astonished and gasped. "Chad? Is that you?" He said "You can see me?" She said "Yes!" He said "You can REALLY see me?"
To be seen.... one of life's greatest gifts. Not to be noticed, but to be truly seen.
How are we showing up for others? At home, at work, in our hustle & bustle of life? Are we brushing past people? When people are talking to us, do we look at them... really look at them? Do we pay them the full attention they deserve, that we all deserve? How is our body language communicating our level of interest in what they have to share? Do we keep doing what we are doing and say "uh-uh" once in awhile, to appease them? Perhaps we are too busy to look up (and hope they move past swiftly)? What place is our listening coming from? Is it a place of curiosity ? Or judgement? To what level are we seeking to understand vs. validate ourselves? Or, perhaps, are we merely waiting for them to finish? What does real listening look like to you?
One of the best things I gleaned from my coaching certification was a better grasp on the ability to listen, an increased awareness of what listening looks like and feels like. I may have thought I was listening well but many times I wasn't. One of my greatest regrets are the times I wasn't listening better. So many times, I thought I was listening, I was looking for the opportunity to insert by view, my advise, my story. Of course, I still have those moments. But, I learned that when I listen, I see people. I really seem them.
Are you seeing people? Really seeing people? What could you seek to understand about their story? How can you can you more fully see people?
As always, I'd love to hear back from you on anything this sparked for you. And, if there are any certain topics, you'd like me to address, shoot me a note on that as well.
As always, the most effective way I have experienced to improve areas in life I feel "stuck" in is through coaching. Reach out if you or anyone you know has an area you'd like to progress in but would like support in identifying or reaching that next step.